Get Away From The Chopper

My parents identify as attack helicopters. Every day, they insist on dropping loaded questions on their unsuspecting children about school and personal life. People say to them that being helicopter parents is impossible, but my parents think it’s fine. Whenever they go on a parenting rant, they’re practically torturing me with Hellfire missiles (that’s how vicious they are). I want them to speak to me properly and respect my right to have my own privacy, but sometimes they don’t. I don’t think they understand that their privileges as a parent don’t extend to constantly helicoptering their children. I wish they were more understanding.

Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration.

The truth is that sometimes my parents do get on my nerves. Whether it’s a constant bombardment of “Did you study (for such and such test)?” or “Anything new today at school?”, they always find a way to aggravate me. I’ve talked to them and stated that I appreciate their “care” and “concern”, and that it’s sometimes heavy handed, but they probably don’t think it matters all that much, because they keep going.

But does it matter a lot?

I remember a time when my parents would incessantly nag, like usual, and then I was forced to reveal the fact that I got a B in math class. The resulting tempest of yelling was something I’ll remember forever. They were super angry and disappointed, and afterwards, I was bawling, I was wailing, and I absolutely hated my parents’ guts. At the time, I really despised how pushy my parents were and how angry they got, but now I realize that this method of parenting isn’t as terrible as I viewed it.

I mean, it’s frustrating to have to report your every activity to your parents like a criminal in jail reports to his warden, but the metaphor only goes so far. I see that through the hailstorm of questions lies their thickly veiled care. I hear that when they yell at me, they’re disappointed but still affectionate, and I know that they, deep down, do love me.

Could my parents be more effective in their practices? Probably. Toning it down might go a long way in terms of a healthier relationship between me and them. But no one can be perfect, and if I consider the other possibilities, like having parents who don’t care at all, then helicopter parenting seems feasible enough.

I guess the question of whether or not it’s reasonable for parents to helicopter depends on their kids. I know that without my parents badgering me, I would have no motivation to work hard or push myself. I wouldn’t be pressured to make my parents proud, and I wouldn’t strive to achieve that perfect score on the ACT or get into that Ivy League college. Other kids, however, might suffer a lot from their parents’ pressure, and might instead want some space to freely express themselves.

For me, there are times when my helicopter parents irritate me, almost to the point of breaking, but there’s also times when I recognize why my parents want to keep an eye on me constantly. I guess I’m pretty thankful for my parents, because after all, helicopters deteriorate eventually, and why wouldn’t you want to make use of one while you still can?